Love Actually: A 2014 Kickoff

future

Earlier today, as I watched the lights explode into thousands of teeny tiny particles in the sky, the realization of the start of another 365 days dawned on me. As 10 years of an undecided future flashed before my eyes, I took a step back and instead allowed myself to ponder and hope for all the wonderful things that 2014 had to offer.

At the start of a new year, I pray you allow imagination to take you to places you’ve never been before. Don’t settle for the conventional. Instead, allow yourself to wander through all the possibilities because when you break barriers and go beyond limits, your possibilities become endless.

I hope beyond every hope that you see the beauty of the world through different eyes each and every day. Only then can you truly appreciate what it is to live. May all the iridescent beauty of the world engulf your senses and continuously remind you of how blessed you are to be a part of something so unbelievably unique and special.

This year, I pray you learn to live not only for yourself but for others as well. Self –pity is selfish and should not be entertained. Whenever you feel worthless, remember that your life is a gift that is meant to be shared with others. There is no room to feel anything else but grateful.

In the new journey you face, I hope you always choose to leave behind regret. There will always be things that could have been but, dwelling on the past won’t change the future. Learn to live in the now instead of the yesterdays. When you’ve mastered that, everything else will fall into place. 🙂

I pray that this year pushes you to write yourself a better story. Dream like a child whose world knows no bounds. Dream with your eyes open to all the wonders that this world has hidden from you. May you allow this year to be the end of mediocrity and the start of amazing tomorrows.

Lastly, it may sound like a cliché but I hope that this year brings you nothing but love. Love in yourself and the acceptance of all your imperfections; love for the people around you and their crazy ways; and love for life and all the ecstasy and heartache that go with it. Always remember that you are blessed and that everything in life is beautiful in its own wicked way.

For the most part, I wish everyone every happiness this world can muster up. 😀

“Our lives are not as limited as we think they are; the world is a wonderfully weird place; consensual reality is significantly flawed; no institution can be trusted, but love does work; all things are possible; and we all could be happy and fulfilled if we only had the guts to be truly free and the wisdom to shrink our egos and quit taking ourselves so damn seriously.”

– Tom Robbins

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR MY LOVES!

May 2014 turn out to be everything you wish it could be and more.

goodbye

A Pre Valentine Confession

Everyone more or less remembers their first love. How it started, how it felt and how it eventually broke your heart. You end up drinking until your world spins, you eat like there’s no tomorrow and you constantly repeat the phrase, “I can’t go on!” like a mantra from a really bad remake of the High School Musical. At the end of it all, you curl up in bed, stare at a photo and bawl your brains out.  Such is the aftermath of having your heart ripped out and shredded for the first time.

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”

-Neil Gaiman

 

After a couple of weeks or months if you thoroughly enjoy wallowing in self-pity, you decide to dust yourself off and revisit the magical land we normal folk like to call the bathroom. After putting on a fresh pair of pants and a relatively new top, you plan the biggest bonfire ever!

You dig up the hidden boxes packed with sweet nothings (receipts from your first date, the little I love you post it notes), the love letters of yester years and the cheesy couple photos with you ALMOST but not quite kissing (because that would just be tacky.) You pile them up in a mound closely resembling an anthill and set everything on fire. Maybe, just maybe it’ll help you forget…  When all the love letters and trinkets have been burned and the rivers of tears have been re-shed, you’re left empty, damaged and alone… That is — until the next one comes along.

crying babs

 

They say that loving a second time is easier. Been there, done that sort of thing. Yes there are butterflies and yes your neck still approaches breaking point at the sight of a pretty face, but unlike the unabashed transparency of young love, the second time around pushes you to become more cautious. After being hurt the first time, you’d like to think you’ve become more learned and more mindful. You learn from your mistakes and you’d like to believe that it’ll be smooth sailing from here on in. Some find this tactic effective and they end up walking that long, flowery white aisle to their happily ever after. Others however aren’t as lucky. After building supposedly unbreakable walls around their hearts, they end up right back where they started… Empty, damaged and alone.

If I’m starting to sound like a love guru, then my mission is complete. Truth be told, the only romantic kind of love I’ve ever experienced is through the movies I’ve seen and the books I’ve read. I’m 24 years old and I’ve never been in love. I may sound like a painfully bitter spinster to some but quite frankly, I don’t give a damn. I love my life and everything and everyone that comes with it. It just so happens that that kind of love has yet to make an appearance. 🙂 It’ll happen when it happens. I’m in no rush. C’est la vie mes amis!

May this year bring you luck in life, happiness in love and fulfillment in everything that is beautiful! 😀

 

“Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering.”

-Nicole Krauss

Haven't met you yet

2012 Year Ender

This year is literally about to end in a couple of hours and I just have to say how incredibly blessed 2012 has been. Here’s why…

This was the year I learned to let go of old dreams to make room for new ones.  When you’ve built something up for so long, it becomes that much harder to leave it all behind. 2012 has taught me that changing paths doesn’t necessarily mean changing who you are. Yes, your goals may have been altered but at the end of the day, you’re still you… And that’s the important thing. 🙂

2012 was the year I truly became brave. I stepped out of my comfort zone and it scared the bejeezus out of me. I started out lost but I knew I had to suck it up or else I’d never be able to get from point A to point B. Again I had to let go of certain things and certain people. It was painful but I became a better person.

2012 was the start of a new chapter in my life. I opened myself up to a whole new world. A world so foreign and different that I almost decided to turn back. But then realized… I already knew what I was going back to. Would I be willing to return to what was comfortable but stagnant or would I venture out and see what else was out there? In the end, I chose the latter and till today, I have never looked back.

I was blessed to have so many amazing people surrounding me. Opening a new chapter meant welcoming new characters  into the fold. Some I was quick to disregard and others were just as quick to latch on. I met a bunch of quirky people who have stretched my heart even wider.This year has been a year of fresh faces and newly built friendships. I am grateful every single day for all of the people who have touched my life in various ways. 😀

This was also the year I let go of regret. There were so many things I wish I did. So many roads I wish I had taken. But wallowing in regret doesn’t bring anything back. It just takes more time away from getting started on something new. This year, I learned to look forward to tomorrow instead of looking back on yesterday. When the day is done, and the sun has set, everything that has happened quickly becomes a memory. There’s no chance of ever going back BUT… there’s always a chance of turning things around when the sun rises the next day.

I’ve always been more of a laid back person. If there was an easy way out, more often than not, I’d take it. This year, I decided to face all the challenges that came my way. Knowing you’re imperfect is one thing. Cashing in all your imperfection chips is another. We’re human, we make mistakes but still… We strive for perfection. This year allowed me to shove mediocrity in the back of the closet along with shame and fear. 2012 was the year I decided to CARPE every freakin DIEM! 😀

Along with my new found love of challenges, I dared to hope. 2012 was the year I sat myself down, reflected on my life, trashed the wistful remnants of the past and created a whole new list of goals, wants and dreams. 🙂 I wouldn’t call myself an optimist but this year, hope seeped from every inch of me. It was hope that kept me going and faith in the big guy that kept me strong. Paths changed, people changed but the big guy up there never did. He’s always had my back and 2012 was no different. 🙂

This year gave me a chance to work on myself. It was the year of revelations, a year of unearthing hidden passions and rediscovering forgotten aspirations, a year of forgiveness and a year of gratitude. 😀

2012 was the year I decided to step up and not go about my life merely existing. It was the year for change, the year for hope and… Though it may sound cliché, the year for LOVE. Love that encompasses every crevice, every nook and cranny of your being until your full to the brim. It was the year my eyes didn’t just see the what if’s and maybe’s but also all the beautiful and exciting things that go hand in hand with all the questions and anxieties of the unknown.

 

goodbye 2012

Here’s to leaving the past behind in place of an even better tomorrow. Happy New Year everyone. I hope and pray with all my heart that 2013 allows you to break walls, dream big and soar higher than the sky. 😀

we are

The Beginning…

This, I believe, is a monumental move for me. I’ve put up a blog back in high school but needless to say, that didn’t work out. I forgot about blogging for a while until I was inspired to open a new blog a few months back by an old acquaintance that I hope to call a good friend soon.

I guess you can say I have trudged through some dark, empty days where I went about the regular routines but never really found any true satisfaction in anything that I did. I felt like I’ve missed out on so many opportunities because I was scared to take risks and put myself out there. If I’m being truly honest with myself, I guess I’ve always been afraid of risking something and getting rejected in the end.

I don’t have a backstory to tell you nor can I share some heart wrenching tale linked with family drama. Truth be told, I’ve lived a very happy and sheltered life. I have a wonderful family who supports all the crappy things I decide to do and I have a great set of friends that go along with the crazy ideas I cook up in this forever jumbled up head I have. In some way, without really meaning to, I think I’ve associated rejection with failure. I know I should be looking at the glass half full instead of half empty, but there are times when I can’t seem to stop myself from venturing off to “the dark side”. There are moments when I become someone who can’t even bring herself to get up and fight back. Weakness tends to overwhelm me and I have to admit, sometimes, I let him have his way.

Now that I’ve learned to accept my flaws and manipulate them to my advantage, I see doors open to a whole new world that I have yet to explore. So yeah… I guess there are things that are unavoidable. That’s why we have HIM up there watching out for us every second, of every minute, of every day. The best part about life is you can choose to mould it any way you want. It’s all about the choices you make and the paths you choose to take. I’ve come to the realization that during those moments of complete resignation, I was never truly alone. If I were, I wouldn’t be here writing about it.

FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND

One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along the beach with God

Across the dark sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene, he noticed
two sets of footprints in the sand,
one belonging to him and the other to God.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the path of his life
there were only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the
very lowest and saddest times in his life.
This bothered him and he questioned God about it.

“God, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you’d walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there were
only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why when I needed you most
you would leave me.”

God replied “My precious, precious child,
I love you and would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you.”

-ANONYMOUS-