This, I believe, is a monumental move for me. I’ve put up a blog back in high school but needless to say, that didn’t work out. I forgot about blogging for a while until I was inspired to open a new blog a few months back by an old acquaintance that I hope to call a good friend soon.
I guess you can say I have trudged through some dark, empty days where I went about the regular routines but never really found any true satisfaction in anything that I did. I felt like I’ve missed out on so many opportunities because I was scared to take risks and put myself out there. If I’m being truly honest with myself, I guess I’ve always been afraid of risking something and getting rejected in the end.
I don’t have a backstory to tell you nor can I share some heart wrenching tale linked with family drama. Truth be told, I’ve lived a very happy and sheltered life. I have a wonderful family who supports all the crappy things I decide to do and I have a great set of friends that go along with the crazy ideas I cook up in this forever jumbled up head I have. In some way, without really meaning to, I think I’ve associated rejection with failure. I know I should be looking at the glass half full instead of half empty, but there are times when I can’t seem to stop myself from venturing off to “the dark side”. There are moments when I become someone who can’t even bring herself to get up and fight back. Weakness tends to overwhelm me and I have to admit, sometimes, I let him have his way.
Now that I’ve learned to accept my flaws and manipulate them to my advantage, I see doors open to a whole new world that I have yet to explore. So yeah… I guess there are things that are unavoidable. That’s why we have HIM up there watching out for us every second, of every minute, of every day. The best part about life is you can choose to mould it any way you want. It’s all about the choices you make and the paths you choose to take. I’ve come to the realization that during those moments of complete resignation, I was never truly alone. If I were, I wouldn’t be here writing about it.
FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND
One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along the beach with God
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene, he noticed
two sets of footprints in the sand,
one belonging to him and the other to God.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the path of his life
there were only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the
very lowest and saddest times in his life.
This bothered him and he questioned God about it.
“God, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you’d walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there were
only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why when I needed you most
you would leave me.”
God replied “My precious, precious child,
I love you and would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you.”